Tuesday 31 May 2011

God's Perfect Timing

So I'll blame my lack of posting on the crazy tiredness I'm experiencing, but I'm going to try to get back into it.  We've been talking prayer at Bible study the last while, and last week we discussed unanswered prayer.  As we discussed God saying not yet to some of our prayer requests, I started to think of what that's been like in our life.  (Side note: we've also talked about our 'Plan A' and God's 'Plan B' in Sunday school and how his plan is better, although we don't always see it at the time.)  So if God had answered our prayers right away for a child, and we never had to wait with any of them, we would have an eight year old instead of a 5 year old.  In fact, we would probably have four children, all two years apart, and be done.  We had very close friends get pregnant the first month they tried and found out that we started trying the same month.  At the time we thought it would be so neat if it would happen right away for us too, but instead their second child, and our first are only a month apart.  They do in fact have four children, and their life looks very different from ours.  As I pondered this, and looked at things, I realized how different our life would look, and I just became immensely grateful for God's timing.
  We would have had two children when we changed churches years ago(to be going somewhere closer to where we lived).  This would have meant friendships with different people.  I would have missed out on the ones I do have.  I have never in my life felt so blessed by the people in my life.  I have an amazing set of friends.  We bonded years ago, and us women get together on a weekly basis to talk and pray with each other.  I can share anything with these women, and I know that they feel the same.  I would have missed out on this blessing.  I can't imagine that.  This closeness will make it very difficult when one of these close friends moves to Kentucky for her husband to attend seminary this summer. 
Another thing that wouldn't have happened is for Chasadya to have her closest friend live on our street.  In God's timing, we struggled with infertility at the same time as friends of ours.  While God answered our prayer sooner than theirs, they were able to adopt a little girl whose birthday is exactly a month later than Chasadya's.  And as things turned out, they moved onto the same street as us.  Who knows if that friendship will continue throughout school, but its nice to know one of the girls she will start kindergarten with, and in fact,  her mom and I are taking turns bringing the girls to school.  Who but God could have orchestrated two infertile couples having girls the same age, living on the same street, who were born on opposite sides of the world. 
And as we look at another child coming into our home, we see another picture of God's perfect timing.  Mikaela has been a bit more of a tricky child to figure out, and has always been a bit more of a "Mommy's girl"  She needs cuddle time after her nap, she's more strong-willed, and tests boundaries more.  With the timing of things, Chasadya will have half a year of school, in which we can establish a routine, and get used to the whole idea of her being gone every morning.  And I will have half a year to have one on one time with Mikaela, to spend just with her, before the new baby comes.  I'm excited about that.  I think it will be good for her to have that time with me, because it will definitely be harder for her to accept a baby into our midst than it will Chasadya.  One of the reasons for that is that she has always been the "baby" and because she's so much about mommy, it will take her time to get used to sharing me.  We pray that it will go smoothly.  But I'm so thankful that I don't have to figure out school and a new baby all at the same time.  God knows how much I can handle, and I don't think I would have handled that well. 
I challenge you to look back and see what God's done in your life.  Where has His timing, His plan been way better than anything you could have picked for yourself?  It may not be easy, in fact, its so much easier to see it in the past, but it would be neat to see it even in the midst of what you're going through.  I also encourage you, that although its hard when prayers seem to go unanswered, that there may just need to be a little more time, and the answer will be so much better for us than we anticipate.  I look back now at the many journeys God's taken us on, and I'm very glad for His timing.

Sunday 15 May 2011

Shifting Perspective

Its been very difficult for me to change my whole mindset in regards to eating and weight loss now that I'm pregnant.  I hadn't realized how much I kept track of it and how many habits(good at the time), I had formed.  This last week I really let myself go with the busyness of the garage sale, and it bothered me a lot.  I ate out often, suppers were not healthy, evening snacking was normal, and exercise didn't happen.  Now I know that I shouldn't be trying to lose weight now, but I do want to be healthy.  And I know that if I can continue to exercise throughout my pregnancy and not gain crazy amounts, that it will be much easier to bounce back later.  So I need to work on changing my whole thought pattern.  Before I was careful with what I ate and diligent in my exercising, and in the month that I got pregnant I lost 5 pounds.  Significant for me.  And it felt really great to see the numbers moving down.  So my goal this week is to get exercising again, and to eat healthy.  If I continue my workouts like before, I need to make sure that I eat enough calories to even it out.  I've looked it up online and found that I don't need very many more calories now than I did before, I just need to make sure I'm taking in the full amount and not trying to stay under a certain number.  I'm also cutting way back on caffeine and increasing my calcium.  I'm not sure whether that will help at all, as my parathyroid messes that all up, and surgery is now postponed till after the baby, but it is something baby needs, so hopefully my body will be able to process some of the extra and give it to baby. 
We were about to go to a natural health clinic about our infertility when we found out we were already pregnant.  But one of the things we knew we would probably need to do if we pursued that was change our eating habits completely, giving up pretty much all sugars and forms it takes, flour and anything processed.  It would have been very difficult, but we would have done it.  Now that we got pregnant without needing to do that, I've thought that maybe its not a bad idea to give up some of it anyway, at least to a certain extent.  'Cause hey, if its supposed to help someone to get pregnant, than likely it would be great for the baby after too.  Just some thoughts, and a bit of a pep talk to myself to get it together this week and not just go the easy route.  But to be fair to myself, I wasn't home last week a whole lot, and the first trimester tiredness has certainly kicked in, so when I was home, I really didn't feel like putting a whole lot of effort into a decent supper.  All this to say that although I am not going to focus on losing weight now, I do still want to be healthy and give this baby the best I can, so I'm upping my game this week and getting back into the healthy mentality.  Its just a shift in perspective now that I'm supporting another life and its not just me. 

Saturday 14 May 2011

One plus One Equals 5

I may need to update my photo soon as it will soon be a misrepresentation.  And why would that be?  Well, I don't look quite as slim as my photo suggests, as I've been eating a little more lately.  However, that isn't the only reason my stomach has been showing a difference.  Yeah, you guessed it.  WE ARE HAVING A BABY!!!  Our family will soon be one person bigger.  No, we didn't know when we changed the girls rooms around.  And we were just about to go to a natural health clinic to see what they would recommend.  God's timing is great, looking at it from this side of it.  Its incredibly difficult to go through it  and we question everything, including timing, but its so easy to see the good now.  I'll have half a year of Chasadya in kindergarten, so we'll be able to get all the kinks worked out.  I'll also have half a year of her being in school to spend with Mikaela, which I think will be a really good thing for her.  Our baby is due beginning of January, and so that's going to be different as I've never had a winter baby before.  It still feels a bit unreal that after waiting almost 2 years for news like this, that its actually happening, but my body is very quickly making it real, as I'm already not able to hide it.  I look like I did at 3 months along with Chasadya, and I'm only 6 weeks.  Seeing as my sister has all my maternity clothes(she's 2 months ahead of me), I'm quickly running out of options in the wardrobe department, and I was hoping to get through a bit of the summer with my old clothes.  That seems increasingly unlikely, which I suppose is normal for a third pregnancy.  It is the reason that we are making it known to the general public, not just family and close friends, already.  Now that garage sale stuff is done, I'll be posting more often again, and I intend to share a bit about the girls reactions and so on.  For now, though, I need to get my girls out of the tub and dressed for bed.  

Friday 13 May 2011

Garage Sale Madness

So, those that follow this blog will have noticed I haven't been writing for a while.  One of the reasons for this is garage sale season, and more specifically, the one my friends and I have been working on together.  My friend and her family are moving this summer to attend seminary in Kentucky, so she needed to put on a garage  sale, and instead of doing one separately at my house, I, and a few other friends, decided to  combine our efforts and have it all at one time.  However, we didn't realize what we were getting into, as more and more stuff arrived and the garage got fuller and fuller.  Now to be fair, its not all our stuff, as we received many donations, but I alone filled our van and car with boxes and bags, plus two truck fulls of furniture.  That has meant many hours spent at her house getting ready this week.  Four of us spent a morning there last week and this week its been a bit more sporadic with everyone else, but I have been there every day, all day, except for 2 hours on Monday, and this afternoon.  I actually only spent one day on pricing my stuff, and the rest of the time helping my friend price and organize.  Needless to say, its been a long week, and we still have tomorrow to sell and clean up.  Through it all, my kids have been amazing.  I've tried not to have them there with me all day, but they have been there for part of the day every day.  That's why we are at home this afternoon.  They and I needed a bit of time at home.  The laundry has piled up, and meals this week have been atrocious, and sometimes you just need some time at home.  We've also been freezing these last few days.  The mitts we were going to sell, we took off the table and wore them instead.  Three layers of sweaters had us considering the winter jackets on our rack.  Certainly not the weather we expected for middle of May.  However, although the weather may have meant less sales as people weren't anxious to stand and browse like they may have otherwise, we have been pleased with the results.  Hopefully it will cover the cost of my last garage sale/shopping trip! 

Monday 2 May 2011

Changes

Friday night the girls decided that they would have a "sleep-over" together in Chasadya's room for the first time.  Although we've talked about it before, we've never actually done it.  There is a bunk bed in there for the purpose of having them in the same room, we had just thought that it would be once we needed the other room for a baby.  Anyways, we decided to let them give it a go, and since they both had a nap that afternoon, we knew it would be a while before they were ready to sleep, but it was a Friday, and it seemed like a good night to try it out, so we went for it.  We didn't worry about them talking as we figured eventually they would fall asleep, so Stan and I went downstairs to watch a movie.  At some point they did (we don't actually know how long it took), so we took it as a success.  The next morning we thought that maybe we should move Mikaela in permanently, and make the other room into a play room.  For me, this was a bit of a stretch, because as I said, it was supposed to be a baby's room, but when we moved here a year ago, we never dreamed that it would still not be converted into that.  It feels like maybe by doing this, I'm maybe coming to accept that things don't work out like we planned.  It feels like my baby is growing up now that she is moved out of her toddler bed into a big bed. 

It actually went quite well until Mikaela saw us moving her toddler bed out of her room.  "MY BED" she says, in a very concerned voice.  The rest of the day she was quite emotional, and needed me a lot.  But we knew what was causing it, which helps to be more understanding.  And by now, she seems just fine.  Its amazing what just a little bit of time will do.  It wasn't that long ago(only a couple weeks), that we had a hard time getting them to sleep in the hotel room together, and now we are having them sleep in the same room night after night.  Its also a little easier to relax about it at home, and just let them talk a while before sleeping.  We know that eventually they'll get used to it, and if they are tired the next day because they were up too late, then it will mean a grouchy day, but we can deal with that.  Chasadya  has been glad to have a new place for quiet time and has claimed the desk in the playroom as hers, filling all the drawers with coloring things. 

It feels like we've entered a new phase here with the girls growing up.  And although they fight like all children do, we also see that they are amazing friends too, and we hope that these years that they share a room will help build a friendship that lasts a lifetime.